On the eighth day God made love

He rested on the seventh day. After making fishes and diamonds and the tiny little fly caught in-between shut louver blades and a dirty mosquito net, he rested. Naked, the lord laid on an earth brown mat interlaced with green cotton threads, his feet stretched out, occasionally he lifted them up and down; he was pleased with what he had done― what he could do. He turned his body over; sleeping on his stomach, God wondered what to make for dinner.

The lord could not fall asleep, there were mosquitoes in heaven. He clapped his right thigh but missed the stinging insect. Heaven was quiet, the drummer angel boy had a headache, he sat by his drums not playing a tune the whole day. God began to fantasize, he thought about all he had made and wanted to make more.

In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth. Soon it became boring because there was no light in his neighbourhood. So God created light and separated the light from the darkness, calling light day and darkness night. God named his pet night, a grey fluffy cat that liked to rest on the lord’s laps.

He patted night and began to talk to himself, God wanted more― more space to stretch his arms while yawning. So the lord created an expanse to separate the waters and called it sky.

God got into his boxer shorts, and thought it should be a good day to swim; so he created the dry ground and gathered the waters, calling the dry ground land, and the gathered waters seas. He realized he wasn’t a good a swimmer so he created vegetation (plants and trees). Up a coconut tree the lord climbed and thought that was all the fun he needed.

On the fourth day God sneezed. Night, the grey fluffy cat, had his fur in God’s nose. The mucus fell on the sky. God took out his handkerchief to wipe the mucus creating the sun, moon, and the stars to give light to the earth and to govern and separate the day and the night.
Night was on heat and started to bite on God’s feet. God knew night was not going to leave his toe alone so, God created every living creature of the seas and every winged bird, blessing them to multiply and fill the waters and the sky with life.

God said that was it― there is nothing more to be created; but he looked in the mirror and thought, if I could keep some company, with what would it be? Then God created ants and the animals to fill the earth. He wondered which animal he should make to run fastest. To help him decide God created woman and man (Eve and Adam) in his own image― only making their hands smaller.

Woman and man had eyes, nose and chin but no mouth. God knew he had forgotten something. God created laughter and put a little in woman and man’s eyes, heart, and stomach. But there was so much more laughter left in God’s hands; then he made teeth and mouth on man and woman and put the rest of laughter in it. He blessed woman and man and gave them every creature and the whole earth to rule over, care for, and cultivate.

God had a lot of free time on the seventh day; he watched man and woman do the azonto dance for a while. He knew he had to learn the azonto too. God rested, woke up, blessed the day and made it holy. He was pretty bored the rest of the day. Adam was watching Eve play football. God thought sports was just a bore. He went back to sleep and had a dream with night on his laps. In the dream God was talking to his mother, she looked just like him. God was really confused in the dream. He asked his mother where she had been all this while; she said she lived in him and then she disappeared. Good woke up screaming “Maa!”

After the seventh day, God noticed his finger nails had grown. Just as he was about to bite them he thought there was one more thing he could make. He looked around him and said ― ‘this shouldn’t be about me’.

Mid morning of the eighth day, god created sex. He examined and then added orgasm — it pleased him that he did. Now God thought he had really out done himself. He hoped his mother would be proud of him.

On the eighth day, God thought something was yet missing in all the beautiful things he had created. He thought of what he could create to make all creation meaningful—from morning through to afternoon of the eighth day God was restless. All the things he had created suddenly felt intangible. Good rubbed his palm on his forehead. He didn’t understand his anguish. “I need something, something made of everything, something to hold everything”, God repeated to himself.

God decided to go for jog with hope the eighth day will pass a lot quicker. He didn’t like the way he felt that whole day. The faster he run, the more anguish he felt. God was now convinced he had one more thing to create. He was taking a shower when he started yelling “yes yes yes!!!” He took his towel and wrapped it around his waist. Stepping away from the waterfall where he took his evening showers the lord thought about all of his creation. His heart raced frantically.

He gathered all he had created and announced “we are going to make love”.
On the night of the eighth day God made love and he said "It was very good."